Misusing language dilutes its original meaning.
As going to therapy becomes increasingly normalized, so too does its vernacular.
Once employed only by mental health professionals, words like gaslighting, boundaries, and trauma have fallen into the vocabulary of the masses.
The general public seems to ignore the fact mental health language is clinical. Just as we wouldn’t diagnose our friends as if we were doctors, we shouldn’t claim the expertise of mental health professionals.
Clinical language should be used by those who understand its meaning.
The misuse of therapy-speak online is invalidating for those in genuinely toxic or abusive relationships. Employing technical elevates the severity of whatever they’re applied to, which can be harmful in multiple ways.
Thinking about a situation through the lens of therapy-speak can escalate a normal problem until it feels overwhelming or unmanageable.
In other cases, therapy-speak can easily be weaponized by one party in a relationship to control or shame another.
Actor Jonah Hill recently received backlash on the basis of text messages sent between himself and his ex-girlfriend, Sarah Brady, which she made public on Instagram. In the messages, Hill lists his boundaries for a partner, criticizing Brady—who spends much of her time surfing—for posting pictures in her swimsuit and having friendships with single women.
Asking somebody who largely devotes their social media to surfing not to post content in their swimsuit isn’t a reasonable boundary to ensure the health of a relationship.
A partner who discourages friendships because they disagree with those friends’ lifestyles isn’t exercising a personal boundary—they’re controlling.
In the dispute between Hill and Brady, therapy-speak wasn’t the problem. He was.
Hill’s behaviour reflects a different phenomenon—people who praise a certain quality in their partners when they’re pursuing them, but attempt to strip them of it once they’re in a relationship to limit their attractiveness to others.
Despite its risks, popularizing therapy-speak can equally be advantageous insofar as it is educational.
Disseminating advice from therapists across social media helps people access a level of care previously only available to a limited group—those with the time and money for therapy.
Normalizing therapy-speak on accessible platforms can increase the chances of somebody encountering information they need to identify their relationship as unhealthy and to escape it.
We don’t have to get rid of therapy-speak. Rather, we should ensure proper education grows along with it.
—Journal Editorial Board
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